Pigs in Space

Bands You Shouldn’t Be Wasting Your Time With (The Annotated List)

righthandman:

herestothehalcyon:

designinganervousbreakdown:

jholla:

pantspantsrevolution:

• 311 – The 90’s called, roofies aren’t cool anymore.
• Tom Petty – This is the music guys who wear Hollister shirts and leather sandals use to make out with a girl in the lawn section of your local music venue after getting her drunk in the parking lot because she’s still under 21 and it’s hard to sneak booze into those places.
• Dave Matthews Band – If Raffi was serious and had an eight minute violin solo.
• Death Cab for Cutie – Your significant other of two months dumped you and your hand is sore from writing poetry in your Moleskine notebook so you decided to take a break and listen to this on your headphones you bought from Urban Outfitters.
• Bon Jovi – Fuck you.
• The Decemberists – Someone decided Death Cab for Cutie wasn’t generic enough.
• The Gaslight Anthem – We can tell you’re from New Jersey because you decided to take Bruce Springsteen’s music and take all the complicated parts out of them.  Some people call this punk influence but I know better—you just don’t have the talent.  Bruce Springsteen got away with those lyrical clichés because he fucking meant it you spoiled fucking brats.
• Animal Collective/Ponytail/any other indie freakout band – Frank Zappa meets King Crimson minus talent or ability but featuring all the pretentiousness.
• Bat For Lashes – Nobody cared about what Chan Marshall did after she regained her sanity so you decided to put a lame-ass electronica beat behind it.
• Bloc Party – Oh, that’s cute, you decided to drop the K so you could show everyone how witty you are.
• Bon Iver – Call me when that incessant falsetto ceases to be obnoxious.
• Coldplay – Someone decided to mix the obnoxiousness of U2 with Radiohead’s old ideas.
• Kings of Leon – See above, but substitute Radiohead with The Strokes.
• The Strokes – Oppers + Downers = Mediocrity.
• Dispatch / OAR / Guster – Want to like Dave Matthews Band but aren’t comfortable with the black members?  I’ve got two bands for you!
• Regina Specktor – Someone finally figured out how to cross Soviet ex-pat piano music with the sound of paint drying.  She has one good song and it’s about a whore.
• Vampire Weekend – If anyone tells you they’re into indie music you can cite this as an example to prove indie music is dead.
• Wilco – It takes an incredible amount of skill to take one of the best and most spontaneous guitarists on the planet and put him in a forum that renders him completely and totally fucking boring.
• Bright Eyes – Elliot Smith is dead and there’s nothing you can do about it.
• The Mars Volta – At The Drive In broke up and half of them decided to make a band that sounded exactly the same sans spontaneity or authenticity.
• Nirvana – Not good, not original.  I know you were into it and it’s very sentimental but you’re probably better off just putting on your old Jock Jams albums, it’s less depressing and less contrived.
• Anything Jack White has ever done – is there a single ounce of originality in any of it?
• Snow Patrol, The Postal Service – I don’t know the difference.  I don’t think there’s a difference.  This is something girls I used to hook up with listened to before I realized I could do better.
• Sublime –They’re a singles band and you hate to admit it.
• The Ramones – They’re MC5 without the talent or the edge.  They did not invent punk, they were a bunch of dudes who didn’t shower and couldn’t play their instruments.  Look at peers like the Talking Heads or Television to see what good music looks like.
• Girl Talk — There is a big difference between interesting ideas and good music.  Lip Gloss + Metallica and Whisper Song + Bittersweet Symphony were good.  That’s it.  It’s fun to listen to because you’re drunk.
• Santogold – Someone found a way to water down MIA.  Hey ladies: if you want to become a famous rapper just fuck Diplo.  It’s a proven recipe for success.
• Lil’ Wayne – Congratulations to Louisiana on finding a lower denominator than Master P’s Ghetto D.
• No Age – stop it, we’ve heard it before.
• The Arcade Fire – Canada found something worse to vomit on the United States than Bryan Adams and Prius batteries.
• Magnetic Fields – Magnetic Fields were able to release 69 Love Songs and have not one of them stir any sort of emotions.  We should hire these guys to be the dude who cuts the wires to diffuse a bomb.  I accidentally originally wrote Of Montreal instead of Magnetic Fields as they’re the same band and equally talentless though more wealthy as they’re now the voice of Outback Steakhouse.
• MIA – The defeat of the Tamil Tigers reinforces that karma is a bitch and bad things happen to bad people.
• Disco Biscuits – This is almost as nauseating as spaz indie.  You know how some people say “You don’t need to be on drugs to like Phish, maaaaaaan!”?  You need to be on drugs to enjoy tDB.
• Reggaeton – Some people claim all hip-hop or all country sounds alike.  There is only one genre of music to be so incredibly bad as to legitimize those sort of ignorant, sweeping statements pertaining to an entire subsection of music.
• Paul Oakenfold / Armin Von Buuren – I used to think I was fairly accepting of most electronic music types until I had a Middle Eastern roommate who listened to nothing but deep trance.  I can’t believe people dance to this—it actually helped me fall asleep.  Never have drugs seemed so boring.

Alright, I think this is a good start.  I’m going to try to keep this updated.  Feel free to reblog or comment with suggestions.

Reblog because this is hilarious…. And I agree with approximately 90% of it…. And because it’s sure to piss people off…..

Reblog because I like at least 11 of those bands and I don’t care who knows it (:  I’ve always been good at wasting time.

Surely that was a joke, right?  There’s some good bands in there.

Their post is obviously invalid due to Jack White being on it.

 Really? I mean really?  I am proud to say I am a fan of several of these bands.  In the words of my co-workers — Keep on rockin’ in the free world.

I miss the US.

sinkships:

I long to return, to see April and her beautiful home again (albeit a different one now), to meet Kim and other Tumblrs where possible, to visit New York again and many other amazing places, to spend in dollars (so weird haha), to eat Hersheys, to be surrounded by… America, I suppose. I had such an immense weekend, and April’s such a wonderful person. I wish I could win the lottery or something, so that I could afford to go back. I have another friend, Ben, who went over for 3 months (I think) and went to various places (including Lexington, KY as a matter of fact) and he misses it like hell… I said we’d do some fundraising at some point so that we can go back. Wondering what we could do and how we’d manage it. If we book well enough in advance and to the right airport it’s something like 250 pounds each, then… I dunno what.

I feel like I am meant to live there at some point, somewhere. I want to explore it so badly…

Me and one of the girls who was over here from Texas this year were sort of joking about doing a life swap for a bit, maybe after 3rd year it could actually happen. Although me and Devin Castro also said the same thing :) THAT one would be really cool!

It’s so meant to be, ha! One day…

Surprise Party

I am excited I get to take my cousin to her surprise birthday party tonight. I liked being sneeky and never lying about what is about to happen. We as a family have been doing things differently since my cousin (her brother) passed away last fall. It just does not seem right to continue the same tradiations without him around. We make more plans to be together than apart. We just change the activities. It has been a hard year and I miss him a lot. Especailly on the 4th of July and Halloween….those were his 2 fav holidays.

Sitting at Home

I have reinjured my achilles this past Tuesday afternoon. I could barely walk to my car to go home. The pain was the worse I have every felt. I went to the dr. Wednesday and he wanted to put a cast on it to help stabilize it. I said ok I would try it. I could not walk with the cast. I decided to give it a couple of days. But I knew Wednesday afternoon this thing was coming off my leg. I could not function at the house. In the kitchen and bathroom I would just slide around because my cast was slick. My mom came over and stayed Wednesday night because I was so concerned about falling. I almost fell numerous times in a short amount of time. I called yesterday morning got the appointment to have it removed. I got a lecture from the help not the dr. about going against medical advice. I reminded them it was my leg and my choice in how I wanted to pursue treatment. Besides the dr. and I had already discussed the modification of my boot to be able to get around.

Now just sitting at home waiting for it to heal. I will be back to work on Monday. yeah team

RIP Simba

einsteinsgirl:

acheron:

bumblebee:

acheron:

who was put to sleep yesterday after being diagnosed with a massive liver tumour.  He was a 12 year old Rhodesian Ridgeback and he was a big soft dollop of a dog.

Ax, is that your big old guy you once blogged a picture of? :(

No my brother in law’s dog - but Rigsby (my old guy) is the same age give or take a week or two….I feel so sad and think it will be Rigsby’s turn soon.

While not your dog, I’m still sorry for your loss.  Lucy is 9 and while that is still relatively young for a dog her size, her back legs are free floating (she has no sockets in her hip joints) and as soon as her muscle mass starts to deteriorate we will have to put her to sleep as there will be nothing they can do and she will be in constant pain.  I don’t look forward to that either.

I’m sorry.